Comments on: On Betrayal (2) http://danishapiro.com/2010/06/on-betrayal-2/ Sun, 05 Feb 2012 14:55:00 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Dani Shapiro http://danishapiro.com/2010/06/on-betrayal-2/comment-page-1/#comment-393 Dani Shapiro Fri, 13 Aug 2010 21:16:25 +0000 http://danishapiro.com/?p=1063#comment-393 Annie Dillard has some good things to say on the subject on The Writing Life as does Janet Malcolm -- if you've never read The Journalist and the Murderer its a must. Annie Dillard has some good things to say on the subject on The Writing Life as does Janet Malcolm -- if you've never read The Journalist and the Murderer its a must.

]]> By: Jen http://danishapiro.com/2010/06/on-betrayal-2/comment-page-1/#comment-392 Jen Fri, 13 Aug 2010 20:46:08 +0000 http://danishapiro.com/?p=1063#comment-392 Thanks for the thoughtful follow up. If you have any additional readings on the topic you might be able to suggest, I'd appreciate it. <br> <br>Jen Thanks for the thoughtful follow up. If you have any additional readings on the topic you might be able to suggest, I'd appreciate it.

Jen

]]> By: Dani Shapiro http://danishapiro.com/2010/06/on-betrayal-2/comment-page-1/#comment-391 Dani Shapiro Fri, 13 Aug 2010 19:11:56 +0000 http://danishapiro.com/?p=1063#comment-391 Hi there, Jen. I do think about this all the time. And sometimes I get burned by it. Janet Malcolm famously wrote that writing is always an act of betrayal. I don't entirely subscribe to this, but I do know that part of being a writer is feeling that little "ping" that goes off when you realize you want -- need -- to write about something. It can be as small as a snippet of conversation, or as large as a family dynamic that you want to explore on the page. I try to look at what I'm doing very carefully to be sure that I'm not needlessly or unwittingly hurting anyone. Rarely, I have hurt someone with what I've written -- there have been times when I haven't realized what would offend someone (especially with names changed). The question of how it's received is one over which we don't have that much control. It's a thorny problem, and an ongoing one. Hi there, Jen. I do think about this all the time. And sometimes I get burned by it. Janet Malcolm famously wrote that writing is always an act of betrayal. I don't entirely subscribe to this, but I do know that part of being a writer is feeling that little "ping" that goes off when you realize you want -- need -- to write about something. It can be as small as a snippet of conversation, or as large as a family dynamic that you want to explore on the page. I try to look at what I'm doing very carefully to be sure that I'm not needlessly or unwittingly hurting anyone. Rarely, I have hurt someone with what I've written -- there have been times when I haven't realized what would offend someone (especially with names changed). The question of how it's received is one over which we don't have that much control. It's a thorny problem, and an ongoing one.

]]> By: Dani Shapiro http://danishapiro.com/2010/06/on-betrayal-2/comment-page-1/#comment-289 Dani Shapiro Fri, 13 Aug 2010 16:16:25 +0000 http://danishapiro.com/?p=1063#comment-289 Annie Dillard has some good things to say on the subject on The Writing Life as does Janet Malcolm -- if you've never read The Journalist and the Murderer its a must. Annie Dillard has some good things to say on the subject on The Writing Life as does Janet Malcolm -- if you've never read The Journalist and the Murderer its a must.

]]> By: Jen http://danishapiro.com/2010/06/on-betrayal-2/comment-page-1/#comment-287 Jen Fri, 13 Aug 2010 15:46:08 +0000 http://danishapiro.com/?p=1063#comment-287 Thanks for the thoughtful follow up. If you have any additional readings on the topic you might be able to suggest, I'd appreciate it.<br><br>Jen Thanks for the thoughtful follow up. If you have any additional readings on the topic you might be able to suggest, I'd appreciate it.

Jen

]]> By: Dani Shapiro http://danishapiro.com/2010/06/on-betrayal-2/comment-page-1/#comment-286 Dani Shapiro Fri, 13 Aug 2010 14:11:56 +0000 http://danishapiro.com/?p=1063#comment-286 Hi there, Jen. I do think about this all the time. And sometimes I get burned by it. Janet Malcolm famously wrote that writing is always an act of betrayal. I don't entirely subscribe to this, but I do know that part of being a writer is feeling that little "ping" that goes off when you realize you want -- need -- to write about something. It can be as small as a snippet of conversation, or as large as a family dynamic that you want to explore on the page. I try to look at what I'm doing very carefully to be sure that I'm not needlessly or unwittingly hurting anyone. Rarely, I have hurt someone with what I've written -- there have been times when I haven't realized what would offend someone (especially with names changed). The question of how it's received is one over which we don't have that much control. It's a thorny problem, and an ongoing one. Hi there, Jen. I do think about this all the time. And sometimes I get burned by it. Janet Malcolm famously wrote that writing is always an act of betrayal. I don't entirely subscribe to this, but I do know that part of being a writer is feeling that little "ping" that goes off when you realize you want -- need -- to write about something. It can be as small as a snippet of conversation, or as large as a family dynamic that you want to explore on the page. I try to look at what I'm doing very carefully to be sure that I'm not needlessly or unwittingly hurting anyone. Rarely, I have hurt someone with what I've written -- there have been times when I haven't realized what would offend someone (especially with names changed). The question of how it's received is one over which we don't have that much control. It's a thorny problem, and an ongoing one.

]]> By: Jen http://danishapiro.com/2010/06/on-betrayal-2/comment-page-1/#comment-285 Jen Fri, 13 Aug 2010 01:11:07 +0000 http://danishapiro.com/?p=1063#comment-285 Hi Dani:<br><br>I returned to this blog post today because I wanted to re-read your thoughts. I'm struggling with the concept of betrayal. I have all this work I really dig, stuff that I've written lately that moves me and excites me because it's good, but I'm afraid to even consider submitting for fear of hurting the people named; the people whose secrets I reveal. Even though the deepest, darkest secrets are actually my own. <br><br>The "what we're doing" in this case, for me? Processing. Completing. Admitting. Expressing my love. But I do fear it won't be received that way. Any additional thoughts or advice since you originally blogged about this? Hi Dani:

I returned to this blog post today because I wanted to re-read your thoughts. I'm struggling with the concept of betrayal. I have all this work I really dig, stuff that I've written lately that moves me and excites me because it's good, but I'm afraid to even consider submitting for fear of hurting the people named; the people whose secrets I reveal. Even though the deepest, darkest secrets are actually my own.

The "what we're doing" in this case, for me? Processing. Completing. Admitting. Expressing my love. But I do fear it won't be received that way. Any additional thoughts or advice since you originally blogged about this?

]]> By: Sarah Albee http://danishapiro.com/2010/06/on-betrayal-2/comment-page-1/#comment-247 Sarah Albee Tue, 15 Jun 2010 11:23:21 +0000 http://danishapiro.com/?p=1063#comment-247 Joining the conversation late, and not to be too flippant about what I know is a fraught subject, but I must say, I love writing for kids, where the good guys and bad guys are pretty clear-cut. My conscience is rarely troubled when I base a bad-guy on someone I know or once knew. I find it deeply satisfying to resurrect people from my past life (and some in my kids' lives) and give them their comeuppance in my story. It's saved me a lot of money on therapy. I like to think of it as Nerd Revenge. Joining the conversation late, and not to be too flippant about what I know is a fraught subject, but I must say, I love writing for kids, where the good guys and bad guys are pretty clear-cut. My conscience is rarely troubled when I base a bad-guy on someone I know or once knew. I find it deeply satisfying to resurrect people from my past life (and some in my kids' lives) and give them their comeuppance in my story. It's saved me a lot of money on therapy. I like to think of it as Nerd Revenge.

]]> By: Dani Shapiro http://danishapiro.com/2010/06/on-betrayal-2/comment-page-1/#comment-241 Dani Shapiro Wed, 09 Jun 2010 05:23:32 +0000 http://danishapiro.com/?p=1063#comment-241 Hi Cal. I need to watch that! Hi Cal. I need to watch that!

]]> By: Cal martin http://danishapiro.com/2010/06/on-betrayal-2/comment-page-1/#comment-239 Cal martin Tue, 08 Jun 2010 15:05:34 +0000 http://danishapiro.com/?p=1063#comment-239 David Sedaris has an insightful and hilarious take on this subject on his David Sedaris at Carnegie Hall audio collection . David Sedaris has an insightful and hilarious take on this subject on his David Sedaris at Carnegie Hall audio collection .

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